||[Sep. 21st, 2006|11:34 am]
trip the light quixotic
|||||air vents - the music of corporate america||]|
Hooollllly hell...you know what I hate? Monologues.
I don't hate performing them, or even learning them. What I hate is finding them. I must read through hundreds of the damn things everytime I have an audition coming up, and I can never get through one without thinking, "Now that has got to be the single queerest thing I've ever heard. There is no way I am saying that outloud." I also hate trying to decide what's "appropriate." No, this one's too serious, this one is too goofy, this one has foul language which doesn't bother me, but... And what's the deal with Christopher Durang. Yes, yes influential playwright yada yada. But is he for real? Or are these little paragraphs people awkwardly pluck out of his works supposed to be as dark comedy/tongue-in-cheek as I imagine them to be?
You know what I like? Some solid Neil Simon. You can always count on old Neil to write you a light-hearted comedic gem. Unfortuately, he's not as prevalent on the internet (legal matters, I'm sure), and what is on the internet is wildly overdone. I should know, I've done it about a million times myself.
I need an assistant. Or a book titled "Monologues That Won't Make You Feel Awkward: The Works of Neil Simon and a Couple Other People."